Former Brighton and Hove Albion centre back thought he would never play football again after devastating heart diagnosis
![Undergoing life changing surgery, Connor said that he texted his wife Kayleigh and said that he 'just wanted to die' as the 'couldn't go through the pain' | Picture: submitted](https://www.sussexexpress.co.uk/webimg/b25lY21zOjUwMjEwMDYwLTExZTUtNDkxNy05MmY3LTQ5M2JmNDgzMzUyODo1ZTNhMWNkNS0yN2IxLTRlY2UtYjdiOC04YTAyM2ZkMDRhODc=.jpg?crop=3:2,smart&width=640&quality=65&enable=upscale)
![Undergoing life changing surgery, Connor said that he texted his wife Kayleigh and said that he 'just wanted to die' as the 'couldn't go through the pain' | Picture: submitted](/img/placeholder.png)
Speaking on Talking Transitions podcast to fellow footballer and ex-teammate Jon Taylor and retired footballer Andrai Jones, Goldson, 31, said that he ‘wanted to die’ when he was just 24-years-old after undergoing surgery for the life threatening heart condition.
At the time, playing for Brighton in the EFL Championship, Connor had a random checkup scan which uncovered he had an aortic aneurysm - a swelling of the large artery which passes through the abdomen which was at risk of bursting with potentially catastrophic consequences - and had to immediately undergo surgery to repair it, especially if he wanted to play football again.
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Hide AdConnor revealed that he ‘cried all the way home’ as he processed the news, but his surgeon later explained that the surgery was necessary and if his heart failed whilst he was on the pitch, there would be no chance of resuscitation.
![Connor Goldson's scar after heart surgery in 2017 | Picture: submitted](https://www.sussexexpress.co.uk/webimg/b25lY21zOjgzNmM5NDdlLWQxYTktNDVjMi1hZDg1LTk5MzBhOTM3NWI2NTo1ODZmNmJiOS01ZTgxLTQ0YWEtOWQ1Yi1jNTg1Y2VlZGM4YTk=.jpg?crop=3:2,smart&width=640&quality=65)
![Connor Goldson's scar after heart surgery in 2017 | Picture: submitted](/img/placeholder.png)
The surgery at the end of March 2017 meant that Connor had to have his chest bones broken with a saw in order to operate on his heart. As he recovered in hospital, the footballer recalled dropping both the morphine and call buzzer and couldn’t move to get them.
He said: “The only thing I had was my phone and I remember I texted Kayleigh (his wife) at the time and said ‘I just want to die, I can’t go through this pain’.”
Connor then took four months off football to recover, and returned for pre-season in July.
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Hide Ad![Connor Goldson of Brighton and Hove Albion celebrates scoring his side's second goal with Beram Kayal during the The Emirates FA Cup Fifth Round between Brighton and Hove Albion v Coventry City at Amex Stadium on February 17, 2018 in Brighton, England. (Photo by Catherine Ivill/Getty Images)](https://www.sussexexpress.co.uk/webimg/b25lY21zOjZjZGU0YjhiLWZmNjItNGQyZS1iNGExLWMyZDYzZDNlYTVjYzo0MDc1MzFkZS1mZjJmLTQzMWEtODNkNC01OWRmYjgxOGYwOWI=.jpg?crop=3:2,smart&width=640&quality=65)
![Connor Goldson of Brighton and Hove Albion celebrates scoring his side's second goal with Beram Kayal during the The Emirates FA Cup Fifth Round between Brighton and Hove Albion v Coventry City at Amex Stadium on February 17, 2018 in Brighton, England. (Photo by Catherine Ivill/Getty Images)](/img/placeholder.png)
Now a father-of-two, Connor shared that his youngest son, aged two, also has an enlarged valve in his heart and will now need to be checked every year to have his heart examined to see if everything is the same as others his age.
His eldest, who is five years old, is also currently borderline and so will need to be rechecked.
Having felt the devastating impact of a heart condition, Connor feels that it’s important to raise awareness.
He explained: “It’s easy for me to say because it affects me and my family but is a random person who’s never felt anything going to go and get checked? I don’t know, I probably wouldn’t have.”
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Hide AdTalking Transitions is a podcast hosted by Jon Taylor and Andrai Jones, where they discuss all things in professional sport, retirement, transitions and success.
The duo is on a mission to shed light on the critical transitions faced by professional athletes, ranging from career changes to mental health struggles.
With Jon still playing professional football today, and Andrai a retired professional footballer, they both understand the unique challenges that professional athletes encounter when transitioning from their playing careers into new stages of life through their own experiences.
These transitions can be exhilarating but also overwhelming and they are committed to providing a platform that equips athletes with the knowledge, resources and support they need to thrive beyond sport.
Watch the full Talking Transitions episode on Connor Goldson here.
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